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My Personal Quest

November 23, 2017 / Comments (0)

On my blog, I’m going to tell you about dates and relationships that I have really experienced. Obviously, I changed the names and places so as not to harm anyone. But what is important here isn’t the spicy story you’re about to read, oh no, the really interesting part is the insights I gained following these experiences, and the tips I will give you, to help you navigate the ocean of singles out there.

At the end of each blog post, I will put a question up for debate; I invite you to reply to it in the secret group I have opened on Facebook…
So who am I?

I am Dew, I was raised in Israel, and I now live in Toronto. I’m happily married and I have adorable twins. I am a mentor and coach for couplehood, and I facilitate workshops. I have my MA in sociology and organizational development and my Bachelors’ in theatre and education.
and just before we finish, here is my story

My quest for my couplehood began when I broke up with my mythological ex. You know, the real one. I was 28 years old already, and he didn’t want to get married. I thought he was the love of my life and was so disappointed to discover that he wasn’t. It was a devastating breakup for me.
So for three long years afterward, I have been dating men on and off without any luck. and then…

On my 31st birthday, a friend dragged me to this fortune teller. She spread her cards out on the table and told me that by 32 I’d be a mother of twins and in a kickass relationship. You read that right: my 31st birthday, and I’m supposed to find the love of my life and give birth to twins within a year, no less. I laughed. I’d just ended a bad relationship; what the hell was she talking about?

Two months later I met this guy. A warm, caring guy, who was good looking and was studying acting in London. Oh, London, mi amore, where I had always dreamed of living and studying. Two weeks later he told me that he wanted me to be the mother of his children. That’s right, he didn’t say “I want you to have my baby”.
He said “children”.

Plural.

A month after that, I had a ring on my finger.

A week later, I discovered I was pregnant; I flew to him in London to celebrate. When I returned a week later, my doctor told me to hold on tight because… it’s twins!
And so, on my 32nd birthday on the Hebrew lunar calendar, my beautiful twins, Jonny and Lia, were born. On precisely my 32nd birthday, I became a mother!
And, no less important, I gained a loving, accepting, romantic partner, who is also my best friend.

Conclusion?

Love can come at you from where you’d least expect, but when it happens… it HAPPENS.

My brother always told me there are three kinds of guy I’m not allowed to date: lawyers, actor, and drummers. So what does my husband do? He’s an actor, of course…
If I had ruled him out only because of his profession, I wouldn’t be where I am today. Oh, and FYI, my husband and my brother are good friends.  We often compile lists of qualities that make up our dream partner, but then reality comes knocking, and it doesn’t always fit our list. Whoever can see the man (or woman) who is waiting behind the list, is the winner!

Our marriage isn’t simple, but we are happy. Whoever thinks that a good, happy relationship is without its difficult times, its challenges and its let-downs, is in for a disappointment.
However… that is a topic for a different blog, a marriage blog.

Sooo… now that you know a little bit about my life partner, I want to go back to the horrible break up and to ask you girls two questions:

  1. What was the hardest thing that happened to you when you broke up with your mythological ex?
  2. What was the best thing that happened to you when you broke up with your mythological ex?

I invite you to consider these questions and to answer them in our closed and secret group on Facebook.
Feel free to contact me here or on my Facebook page if you have any questions or comments

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Last modified: November 28, 2017

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